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What if the Battle School shuttle had a dance party?

February 11, 2016 By Aaron Johnston

The new music video from OK Go was shot entirely in zero gravity in a single take. The band has come a long way since their first vid with treadmills. This is insane. And a huge production.

I can’t help but think about Battle School whenever I see people flying around in free fall. If disco balls and balloons filled with paint were allowed on the shuttle from Earth, maybe Ender would have enjoyed the flight a little more. Then again, maybe not. This probably isn’t Ender’s scene.

OK Go – Upside Down & Inside OutHello, Dear Ones. Please enjoy our new video for “Upside Down & Inside Out”. A million thanks to S7 Airlines. #GravitysJustAHabit

Posted by OK Go on Thursday, February 11, 2016

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Filed Under: FEATURED, Blog Tagged With: Ender's Game, OK Go, Orson Scott Card

The bewildering appeal of Donald Trump

February 10, 2016 By Aaron Johnston

Trump International Hotel Washington, D.C Groundbreaking Ceremony
(Photo by Paul Morigi/WireImage)

Donald Trump’s victory last night in New Hampshire validated what polls have been saying for months: that Trump is the GOP frontrunner for the nomination. This despite the fact that he has zero political experience, villifies immigrants and Muslims, has appallingly bad ideas, and has the eloquence and demeanor of a middle-schooler.

Those who revere Trump would likely say that his lack of political experience is his greatest strength. He’s an outsider. He hasn’t been tainted by the system. He doesn’t live in the pockets of special-interest groups. He hasn’t hob-nobbed with lobbyist and sold his vote to anyone except the American people.

Fine. But do you know who also meets those standards? Nearly every single person in America. You could say the same thing about me or yourself or your dear Aunt Myrtle, but that doesn’t mean that we’re qualified to be president of the United States. A president must work with everyone within the political system, including those within in his own party, those in the opposing party, and those of other nations throughout the world. He must compromise, unite, build coalitions, build concensus, build confidence in America.

But that’s what Trump is good at, say his supporters. He wrote The Art of the Deal. He’s a brilliant negotiator. He’s been bringing people to conference tables to hash out mergers and acquisitions and deals of all sorts his entire career. He knows how to work the room; he knows how to get the best deal for himself; he knows how to get everybody’s signature on the final contract. The man is a master at getting things done.

Fine. He can run a corporation. Or even many corporations. He knows when to hold them, and he knows when to fold them. Great. But the United States is not a corporation. Donald Trump would not be the CEO of America. The country’s bottom line is not our only measure of success. Yes, all CEOs must also consider their employees, but we are not the employees of Donald Trump. We’re not even the employees of America. That’s communism. We’re the employees of ourselves. Well, technically we’re the employees of whoever pays our salaries, but you see my point. We don’t work for the president. We don’t seek his approval or give him obligatory applause at the company Christmas dinner. We’re free. The president works for us. He makes decisions and encourages policymakers to protect our freedom and our rights to be us.

And the president must do that by having ideas that the American people can get behind.

Yet whenever pressed for specifics on his policies, Trump is evasive, promising essentially that “he’ll get the best people together and they’ll get the best ideas and results.”

OK. I guess we’ll take your word for it, Mr. Trump. No, no, don’t tell us what those ideas are or even who these brilliant people are. We don’t need to know. As long as you say it’s so, we’ll believe you.

Granted, Trump has proposed a few ideas. The one that gets the most press is his proposed wall along the Mexican American border to stop the flow of immigrants into the United States. It’s estimated that the wall would cost about $8 billion, and Trump claims he’ll give the bill to the Mexican government, which of course is ludicrous. Why would Mexico fork over a single peso to build a structure that does not benefit them in the slightest?

Personally, I don’t think Trump intends to build anything of the sort. I think he’s merely capitalizing on the racism that exists in America toward immigrants and Hispanics.

Note: I am not suggesting that everyone who supports the idea of a wall is a racist. I don’t believe that. I am merely suggesting that racism toward Hispanics and immigrants exists in this country and that those who despise those groups of people gravitate toward Trump as their candidate of choice. He has made inflammatory and derogatory comments about immigrants, to great applause at his rallies.

And for those who would disagree with my using the term “racism” (which I agree is a harsh and hot word), what term would you use? If not racism then what is it exactly?

NPR this morning interviewed one Trump supporter in New Hampshire and asked him why he voted for Trump. His response was, “I go into Panera and I hear people speaking in Spanish. That’s just not right. This is America. If you’re going to live here, you need to speak English.”

In other words, this person voted for Trump because Trump dislikes immigrants, because people need to speak English here dadgummit!

If that’s not racism, I don’t know what is. His complaint wasn’t the infringement of economic opportunities for American citizens. It wasn’t entitlement programs for non-citizens. It was his grating annoyance at hearing someone speak a foreign language. And by golly, that has got to stop!

It baffles me.

Granted, if you look at the Trump site, there are a few good ideas. Like Trump’s proposal that all veterans eligible for VA health care can take their veteran’s card to any doctor or car facility that accepts Medicare to get the care they need immediately.

On paper that’s a good idea. It largely diminishes the need for VA hospitals at all if vetereans can go anywhere Medicare is accepted, but it does address a real need. I was in an auto accident the other day with a Vietnam vet (his fault), and he talked about the need to drive hundreds of miles to the the nearst VA hospital in Atlanta. He also claimed the care he got at VA facilities was far better than he could get anywhere else. So I suspect this gentlemen would appreciate Trump’s proposal.

But guess what? Marco Rubio says essentially the same thing, although Rubio takes is a stop further and proposes giving veterans a financial equivalent in funds so that they can seek care from the private sector provider of their choice. So not just Medicare providers, but anybody.

Ted Cruz says the same.

So yes, Trump has some ideas. But they’re not unique, except of course for the ones that are discriminatory and inflammatory.

And that’s what I don’t understand. I don’t see why people rally to his banner. It’s not for his ideas. It’s not for his statesman-like demeanor, because he doesn’t have any. It’s not for the poise and respectability he would bring to the office.

I can only assume that hundreds of thousands of people cheer his name because they want a straight shooter. They want someone who will speak his mind, unscripted, and unfiltered by political influences. They want strength, not some pre-programmed Washington robot. The want the real deal, raw and emboldened and shooting from the hip. That feels refreshing. That’s different. That’s alien to the political system. Not since Teddy Roosevelt have we had such a blustery fireball of unforgiving candor. Nobody owns Trump, and he’ll be darned if anybody tries.

But is that the qualifications for president we hold most dear? Is that what makes a man or woman apt for the job? A sense of frankness and fearlessness? A loud mouth? An unpredictable brashness?

I think of Jesse Ventura when I look at Trump. But not the former governor of Minnesota version; I see the wrestler version, grabbing the microphone from the commentator and filling the auditorium with threats and promises of harm for the other guy. “Oh yeah, Putin? Is that what you got? Well, I’m gonna put a hurt on you like you’ve never seen. I’m gonna squeeze you so hard, your eyeballs pop out. I’m gonna tie you into a knot so tight…” and on and on.

To that the Trump supporter would say, “You’re darn right! It’s about time we stood up to Putin. It’s about time we squeezed out his eyeballs. Obama has made us a laughing stock. We are weaker in the eyes of the world than we were seven years ago. We’re a laughing stock. Nobody takes us seriously. We need to stand up and make America great again.”

I think it’s that slogan that has done the most good for Trump. It’s a smart bit of marketing. Let’s make America great again. The implication of course is that America was once great. We used to have our stuff together. We used to be the gold standard of the world in terms of economics and human rights. We used to inspire people across the globe. We used to stand for something, mean something, BE something. But we’re not anymore. We’re less than we were. We’ve shrunk in esteem. We’ve diminished in influence. We’ve dropped down a few ladder rungs in terms of global respect. We’re not the class president anymore. We’re not even the treasurer or the captain of the football team. We’re the what? The nerdy chemistry teacher everyone makes fun behind his back?

Well that has to end. We need to be on top again. We need to be the best. We need to be numero uno with our chests puffed out and our heads held high.

And it’s that call for greatness that appeals to people most, I think. That end of mediocrity, that promise of reaching our former lofty position of grandeur.

I’m not opposed to that of course. No one is. Everyone wants America to be great.

And I’d agree that America is not the America is has been in the past. We’re not as strong as we once were in terms of global respect and admiration. We’re not the gold standard. I just don’t see how Donald Trump can get us there. If anything, we would become even more disliked and hated and despised. Trump is already the punchline for media coverage throughout the world of this election. The Brits want to ban him from the country. Terorists are using his sound bites in their recruitment videos. Europeans are snickering and rolling their eyes as they read the papers and chew on croissants. How can Trump, who is already the producer of so much global and national disdain, take us anyway but down?

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Filed Under: FEATURED, Blog

Toccoa Falls

February 8, 2016 By Aaron Johnston

We went on a brief vacation this past weekend to the north Georgia mountains. This is the off season, so there were very few people around, even on the trails. I enjoy hiking, but our girls are still young and haven’t yet captured the spirit of it all. Or maybe it’s simply a matter of having shorter legs. They have to take three steps for each one of mine, so whenever we set out they tire quickly. They love the outdoors, however, so I’m hoping that as they grow older, they’ll be more willing to tackle even longer hikes.

The highlight of the trip was a brief hike to Toccoa Falls, which is located on the campus of Toccoa Falls College, a small, liberal-arts Christian college in—you guessed it—Toccoa Falls, Georgia.

The waterfall has a 186 feet drop, which is huge, but it’s not even the largest in Georgia.

Falls.small

You really can’t get a sense of how high this waterfall is until you spot my family there at the bottom. Such a huge drop.

Also, you can’t see from the photo, but there was a large pool at the bottom. Very picturesque. Oh, and the lovely rainbow from the mist, which ends at my family, making them my own little pot of gold.

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Filed Under: FEATURED, Blog Tagged With: Family Hiking, Georgia, Toccoa Falls

Ten Ways to Improve the World Cup

July 14, 2014 By Aaron Johnston

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1. Each team has a sniper somewhere in the stands. Not real bullets, of course. Paint balls. Snipers can take three shots a game. If you’re hit, you must play dead until the final whistle. No head shots! Goalies can’t be targets. Obviously.

2. Everyone carries a pool noodle. For whacking opponents.

3. The official World Cup mascot is always on the field. He’s never offsides. And he switches teams at his leisure.

4. During extra time, the ball is lathered in zebra’s blood, and two lions are released.

5. The men of the most recent season of The Bachelorette form a team. They start each game with twelve points. You know, to be fair.

6. Every team can magically summon one fictional character to join their team each game. Batman, Harry Potter, King Kong, etc.

7. Water balloons.

8. One sinkhole per game, no more than two meters in diameter. But it’s magic, so once it forms it never stops moving around the field.

9. During penalty kicks, the goalie selects one of the following weapons: fire hose, peregrine falcon, or Tyrion Lannister.

10. After every game, teams link arms and sing “We Are the World” in their respective languages. The coaches saddle the lions and chase the mascot. Michael Bay directs the fireworks, which are of course fired down onto the field.

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Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: Brazil, World Cup, mascot, soccer

My review of Suspect by Robert Crais

May 6, 2014 By Aaron Johnston

15755201I’m not a dog guy. Never have been. We had a couple small dogs when I was a kid, but I haven’t been around dogs for twenty years or so. Allergies. Plus all the mess and hassle. They shed, they chew up the furniture, they need shots. You’ve got to walk them, feed them, pick up their poop with a plastic grocery bag. What could be more degrading? But Suspect by Robert Crais makes me want to run down to the Humane Society and get a dog immediately. A big dog. A German Shepherd. I won’t of course. My sinuses would cinch up tight, and my eyes would get puffy. But man, it might be worth it if my dog were as loyal and loving and full of soul as is Maggie, the co-protagonist in this excellent crime thriller. Maggie was a bomb-sniffing dog working with the Marines in Afghanistan before she was wounded and lost her handler. When she partners with a K9 police officer also suffering from his own tragic past, the true pack and partnership of the novel begins. And oh what a novel it is. This is Crais at his best. A crime thriller that sinks its teeth in you and won’t let go, just as Maggie is trained to do. Like all Crais novels, it starts with a bang and then settles into a slow gradual boil as the mystery unravels and the truth comes to light. Honestly, this one is right up there with the best Elvis Cole and Joe Pike novels, which I didn’t think possible. I hope we see Maggie and Officer Scott James is many more thrillers to come. I guarantee you I’ll be there, leash in hand, ready to hook and go along for the ride.

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Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: German Shepherd, Robert Crais, Suspect

My review of Taken by Robert Crais

February 17, 2014 By Aaron Johnston

Taken (Elvis Cole, #13 / Joe Pike, #4)Taken by Robert Crais

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I love Elvis Cole novels. Crais is a master. He tries a few new techniques in Taken, and I wasn’t a fan of them all, though I did thoroughly enjoy the story.

One such literary technique: Crais flips from first-person point of view with Elvis, the world’s greatest detective, to third-person with every other character in the novel, including my favorite repeat character Joe Pike. You would think this shift in point of view would be jarring, but Crais pulls it off easily.

What didn’t work as well for me was the non-linear story telling. Rather than proceed from start to finish, Crais has us jumping around in time. I listened to the audiobook, and I literally had to stop my iPod and check because I was certain it had inadvertently skipped several chapters. Alas, that was not the case. Crais simply gives us story event #8 right after story event #4 and then comes back later with events 5, 6, and 7. It took some getting used to, and by the time we settled into linear story telling about three fourths of the way through the novel, I was at ease and content.

If there was a reason for this non-linear approach, I didn’t see it. If anything, it hurt the story by revealing events before they happened and robbed us of experiencing them in all their shock and awe. This felt like showing everyone’s hand in a poker game before the betting begins. It took a lot of fun out of the experience.

And yet I still give the thing four stars. Because after all, it is Robert Crais.

View all my reviews

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Filed Under: FEATURED, Blog, Writing

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